On my many Jersey Shore adventures, I discover many things, which I'm sure you may have noticed by now. Attention girls: bikini bottoms are meant to be worn on the beach now in bars. I completely understand going to a bar in a cover up, this is totally acceptable. It is not acceptable to walk in with a wife beater which is too short for you and no bottoms, with your crack showing. No one finds this attractive.
The girls who tend to do this are also not the girls that should. Why wouldn't your friends tell you and your thunder thighs need to put on shorts, a romper, a dress, even a freakin towel to cover up. Especially when you are leaning over the bar trying to get drinks, (and think you should be served immediately because you are the hottest girl there) your ass is hanging out. Not a little, but a lot.
Most people do not want to sit in a seat after you have left, because your gross. Guys do not like this. Plus you are leaving your self open to anyone walking by to pull those babies down. Do you not have any self respect or a mirror? (there's one in every bathroom)
All in all I have a message to the 17yr old bouncers, do not let these people in places. They are ruining the shore along with the dailys!
Tuesday, July 26, 2011
Friday, July 15, 2011
Un-Pedicured Toes
All I have to say about this is seriously!?!? In this day and age to find a women wearing a sandal, wedge, or flip flop with out a pedicure or some polish on their toes is just disgusting. There is really no excuse for this type of faus paux. I see people who are on food stamps paint their toes, which means people who are in Lord and Taylor can afford the $20 pedi. Like why aren't your toes painted? Did someone tell you that your natural nail color is attractive? If so, they lied.
Also why is that the people with the un-pedicured toes, have the worst looking feet. These are the women with the hammer toes, missing nails, and toe hair. They are the same women who try to squish their feet in a size 6 shoe when they are an 8. That's not a good look ladies.
If you are lucky enough to have not ran into any of these women, visit your local Costco. They are in line for the free samples. I'm sure you can find a good amount of these women in the shoe aisle of Wal-Mart, thinking they are buying designer shoes. These women are disgusting and really should not be allowed out. Wear a sneaker or a pump. Peep toes were meant for people with cute hot pink painted toes, not for toe fungus infested feet.
All in all, if your toes are not painted, don't wear an open toed shoe. No one wants to see that.
Also why is that the people with the un-pedicured toes, have the worst looking feet. These are the women with the hammer toes, missing nails, and toe hair. They are the same women who try to squish their feet in a size 6 shoe when they are an 8. That's not a good look ladies.
If you are lucky enough to have not ran into any of these women, visit your local Costco. They are in line for the free samples. I'm sure you can find a good amount of these women in the shoe aisle of Wal-Mart, thinking they are buying designer shoes. These women are disgusting and really should not be allowed out. Wear a sneaker or a pump. Peep toes were meant for people with cute hot pink painted toes, not for toe fungus infested feet.
All in all, if your toes are not painted, don't wear an open toed shoe. No one wants to see that.
Thursday, July 7, 2011
It's All About the Benjamins
If you are a female, live in New Jersey and have been to a bar with a band, you absolutely know who the Benjamin's are! ( or Benjis for short). They are by far, Jersey's best cover band and best looking for that matter. There's nothing like witnessing Joe Benjamin flip his mic, with sweat dripping down his face, while singing "Take Me Home Tonight". (he can take me home any night) What girl doesn't like a group of men serenading her to her favorite 80's music??? No one in Jersey will disagree with this.
The Benjis have been around for many years, dating all the way back to the good ol' days of Park City. Some people may say they are getting a bit old, but in my opinion they are hotter than ever. Age has treated them great and they still sound amazing. No one can sing Gaga like they can! Sure Bitter X will try, but they are no Benjis. There are many bands trying to get the Jersey Shore fame that the Benjis have. These bands are all just imposters and losers and a good chance oafs. For example, Dog Voices. Dog Voices are awful. I wouldn't put my dog through listening to their sound. They are also not sexy and if they tried to flip a microphone, it would hit some middle aged women in the head, and she would not be happy. Plus they are the only cover band with an album and original songs....I mean, 17 March...Best Song Ever!
So, yes, I might be a bit of a Benji groupie, but if you saw them, you would be as well. I'm going to be that "middle-aged woman" trying to dance on stage and sing with the band.
*************************DEDICATED TO L.P*************************************
The Benjis have been around for many years, dating all the way back to the good ol' days of Park City. Some people may say they are getting a bit old, but in my opinion they are hotter than ever. Age has treated them great and they still sound amazing. No one can sing Gaga like they can! Sure Bitter X will try, but they are no Benjis. There are many bands trying to get the Jersey Shore fame that the Benjis have. These bands are all just imposters and losers and a good chance oafs. For example, Dog Voices. Dog Voices are awful. I wouldn't put my dog through listening to their sound. They are also not sexy and if they tried to flip a microphone, it would hit some middle aged women in the head, and she would not be happy. Plus they are the only cover band with an album and original songs....I mean, 17 March...Best Song Ever!
So, yes, I might be a bit of a Benji groupie, but if you saw them, you would be as well. I'm going to be that "middle-aged woman" trying to dance on stage and sing with the band.
*************************DEDICATED TO L.P*************************************
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